Everyone prefers stability to volatility ; habitudes are reassuring and changes are stressful.
Once you find your comfort place and settled in your routine, it is hard to get out of it. You buy coffee at the same shop everyday? You take the same route to go to work? You watch the same TV program every night? Some may call them preferences – “I like that coffee at that particular shop”, “It is the shortest to way to get to my workplace”, “I find the TV program exciting”-, but they are, on the other hand, taking away greater pleasure of discovering new things from you.
Not only your preferences, but also your entire life might have been missing many opportunities of making it better and more enriching because of your escape reaction to changes.
Living in a world you know well is surely easier. No one likes the feeling of not being able to control the situation in a place you are not familiar with – even finding public toilets becomes more stressful when you’re in a foreign country -.
However, this morning I came across a powerful passage in a great book called “Glimpses of World History” by Jawaharlal Nehru.
Nothing in the world that is alive remains unchanging. All Nature changes from day to day and minute to minute, only the dead stop growing and are quiescent. Fresh water runs on, and if you stop it, it becomes stagnant. So also is it with the life of man and the life of nation. Whether we want to or not, we grow old. Babies become little girls, and the little girls big girls and grown-up women and old women. We have to put up with these changes.
Everything in the world is changing ; even you are changing through time. There is, in reality, no way to escape from changes. So why not appreciate them, instead of trying to avoid them? After admitting the fact that life itself is dynamic and the idea of “settling down” is inconsistent with the nature of life, you may be able to start welcoming changes and be more open to new opportunities.
Remember, “Fresh water runs on, and if you stop it, it becomes stagnant.” Leaving your family for your studies is sad, breaking up with your partner is depressing, and there is nothing more heartbreaking than losing someone you love… But your life must go on, constantly changing and evolving. Otherwise if you “settle down” and shut out changes in your life, whether those changes are positive or negative, your life becomes boring, colorless and “stagnant“.